So the wife and kids have been up here in New York just over three weeks at this point. We’re figuring out what it’s like for Anne to be a stay at home mom while also developing new relationships herself. We're figuring out what it's like for our older boy to start a new school while the younger one is home and no longer in daycare. We’re learning what it’s like to build a new life somewhere.
So much of why we left what we knew is wrapped up in forcing ourselves to grow. It's been a dance of learning something new while also maintaining responsibilities. While I want to say Anne the Wife and I have done a decent job so far – both as a couple and as parents – it still feels like we're constantly stepping on each other's toes.
By default I lean into what's comfortable. Obsessing over money and finances has always been a warm blanket for me. That's not to say I'm an expert, but I can sure as hell build out a spread sheet and balance a checkbook. A very close second is losing myself in trying to make an image. So much of my time over the years has been experienced through a view finder or monitor that honestly it's much easier to keep moving forward behind a camera than not.
Being a good dad and husband: f
*ck that's hard. As much as I'm expecting to grow professionally and creatively in this new season, the biggest challenges so far have been centered around family. Anne and I have been at it long enough that we can squabble and work it out, but there's no diplomatic or elegant way to say I count it a win when I make it through an entire day without wanting to strangle our kids. At six years old Elliot is coming more into his own and making his own decisions. Flynn is 19 months old and can't talk so yelling at the top of his lungs seems to be the next best thing. How that kid still has vocal cords is beyond me.
While I've been pushing hard to make new professional and creative relationships, Anne has been just as intentional about connecting with other young families also living in the city. It's been a trip peeping into other family dynamics and trying to gleen what we can.
Surprisingly, one of my favorite things about Instagram has been seeing other creatives who also happen to be dads work out and share how they stay creatives while also trying to raise tiny people. You'd better believe I screenshot the hell out of these parental nuggets. And seriously, thank goodness for the whole AMA thing.